It's not even the new year and the tennis is already back...

Is the whinge that I'm hearing from my Dad. 'Tis not my fault, 'tis not the tennis player's fault. It's just the way it is. And it's on, because I like to watch the tennis.

Principessa had a lovely mood on today. She was so good while we were at the bookshop and coffeeshop. Grandand left us in the coffeeshop to have our drinks, so it was just Principessa and me, and it was soooo nice having mummy-daughter time while we were out. That doesn't happen too often because if Principessa decides she doesn't want to be good, I am unable to get the wheelchair moving fast enough to catch her. But it was lovely, and I am very contented this afternoon.

I have been working on a story and character outline for a story that has been niggling at the back of my head for about the last year and a half. I've started doing some proper research for it and it is feeing more and more interesting to me. I'm just having problems with the characters at the moment. I need to think more about their motivations.

The LRRH short story has also opened up some new possibilities. The character seems to have piqued my interest, so I think I might like to do some more writing with her, but also the background for the story seems to have fitted into an idea I began scribbling down last year. It may lead to some more short stories for other chararcters in that world. Woohoo!

I think I will have to transcribe the NaNo story onto computer soon, just to get back into the plot. It might help me work through some of the plot demons that are currently possessing me. I am still unsure how to work my way out of my literary prison, the dynamite device is eluding me. Harrumph!

Apart from all the writing stuff, I've still got to do a lot of work on the OU stuff. I think I might have to start sitting down at night and working through some of it. I have got to write a short essay pretty soon, though I am not too worried about that. I am more worried about the second assignment, as it is covering art, poetry and philosophy. Having never studied art or philosophy, I am a bit dubious about how I will handle it. But we'll see how it goes.

So, I am going now to write out some sort of time plan so I can fit everything into the day! I think I may have to start having early mornings, or just continue having late nights. I'll have to have a go at both to find out what time of day I am most productive.

Just one last thing;

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2008!

The horror of bedtime.

I hate it. I really do. Taking Principessa to bed last night was completely draining and horrifying. She decided she wanted to go to sleep in Nanny's bed, but when Nanny left her room, Principessa had to go to. So Nanny told her she couldn't sleep in her room. I then then tried to take Principessa into our room, but to no avail. Cue the kick-off. Out comes the tears and the tizzyfit, and me shouting (I hate shouting at her), and the refusal to go to bed.

Nanny comes back, and Principessa squeezes past me (I am stood still on the landing, worried that Principessa might just push me over the banister to get what she wants. Yeah, she's only three, but I'm not good with balance.). Nanny then changes her mind and allows Principessa to sleep in her room. So not impressed. Things like that only teach her that if she can't get what she wants from me, she only has to go cry to Nanny. Fantastic, not. Pah! And then, this morning, Principessa tells me she doesn't need me and doesn't want me, all because I didn't put CBeebies on when she demanded it. I am so not looking forward to more days like this.

I have been looking through and trying to do some of the exercises in the prep material for the OU course. Hmmm. I'm not sure if I will do well on this, but I can only try. I am still trying to get my head around the workload of the actual course. I have to try and devise a plan so I can fit things in and around Principessa. She doesn't start school again until February, and I am just hoping that she settles in this time around. To be perfectly honest, I'm not counting on it happening.

I think I have finally finished editing my LRRH story. I think it has changed greatly from the first draft. I am feeling quite proud of it, and was thinking of submitting it to a publisher for inclusion in an anthology. Maybe I'll just submit it to a magazine instead. I think I'd feel more comfortable with submitting to a magazine first. I need to get some submission experience before I go for anthologies. Anyway, we'll see. I enjoyed writing the story, regardless.

I have had some more ideas bombarding me, this time for a sci-fi story. I'm thinking that I might be able to integrate some of these crazy dreams I have been having recently into the storyline. I just have to go and do some research into Victorian society.

I might just ressurect the NaNo story. I feel it needs revisiting for a while.

Happy Holiday!

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year to all. Have a fantastic time, and may all your wishes come true.

I'm off to wrap pressies.

Brain is in subconscious overdrive.

I like sleeping. Lots. But not when my mind is playing funny tricks on me (even when these tricks could be used in a story.).

The last two nights, I have been having the strangest of strange dreams. The dream the night before last wasn't too bad, it was a chase and hide dream, so for the most part whoever I was sat back in a hiding place watching the action. And interesting action it was too, with super-fast martial arty blokes with swords...

But last night, a totally different chase type dream all together. Whoever I was happened to be on the run. It was tense and dangerous, and when it woke me up I was breathing shallow, hoarse breaths (like it was actually me legging it) and my heart was pumping like it never has in my chest. (Okay, I lie. It pumped like that a few months ago when I had another dream where I had been eviscerated by some weird alien. Well, I never said my dreams were sane!) Not only was my heart thumping and my chest hurting, but blood was hammering out some tribal beat in my head. It all made me feel quite afraid. I had to wake myself up fully before I had the chance to go back to sleep, so worried was I that I would close my eyes and the dream continue.

It only makes me think that my muse wants me to start a new story. There are some intriguing ideas appearing in the dreams of late, but by God, do they hurt!

Goal achieved!

Yay! Woohoo! I've finally broken the duck!

I have finished my LRRH short story. I can't actually believe it! It's the first piece of writing, apart from poems, that I have completed since I was in school. I feel good! I finally feel like I've achieved something. Now all I have to do is work out my plot angsts for what was the NaNo story and get going again with that.

*Sigh*

Oh, on other things, Principessa insisted on writing a letter to Grandand the other night before she went to sleep. Here it is.

Dear Grandand,
I wanted to give you a postcard.
Gently and Doctor are lost.
I love you lots and lots, Grandand.
Captain DJ jumps up and down.
Captain DJ gets her feet stuck.
Nina doing handstanding.
Mister Maker sits down to read his book.
Charlie and Lola scratch their heads.
Captain DJ is so really tired.
Captain DJ is drinking her bottle o' tea.
Principessa wants to be a mouth.
Captain DJ is fixing all of his walls.
Captain DJ is clapping her hands.
Captain DJ is brushing her teeth.
Principessa is eating her dinner.
Mummy needs to help Principessa.
Principessa is going to the hospital.
Principessa is so really tired.
We having a bath, splashing.
Principessa is going to do painting.
Ha. Ha. Ha.
Principessa loves Nanny lots and lots.
Principessa is doing the spiders.
Can you tell a note for Mr. Tumble?
Mr. Tumble is sliding up the bed.
Mr. Tumble is swimming on the beach.
Principessa is doing the shadow.
Principessa loves Mummy too.
Captain DJ jumped off the bed and hurt her back.
Lots of love, Principessa xxxxxxx
(C) Principessa 2007

The Golden Compass.

********SPOILERS**********

I don't see what all the fuss is about. Having read the books and enjoyed them immensely, I thought the film, despite a few key omissions, was good. Yeah, good. Not great, but good. I feel that for the sake of possibly a half hour extra, with some attention being paid to the important little details, this film could have been a masterpiece.

For instance, the fact that Lyra is an habitual liar was hardly touched upon, so when she spun her fib about being Iorek's demon to Ragnar, the Ice Bear King, it lost some of its impact. This lie was important as Lyra was lying 'for the good', but due to the fact that her lying hadn't been much touched upon earlier in the film it gave a key moment in the storyline a very lack-lustre, put in as an afterthought, feeling.

Another point that got my goat was that not enough emphasis was placed on the fear of the Gobblers. There was hardly a mention of the Gobblers, even though this was a very important plot device.

At the start of the film, and the introduction of Lord Asriel, I feel another important plot device was missing. In the book, during his presentation about Dust, he shows the board a skull that has had holes drilled into it. This device of trepanning is important further along into the story and would be part of the second film.

But anyway, apart from this, I thought the film was more or less faithful to the book. The CGI effect for Lyra reading the alethiometer was overused and detracted from the film a little, though it was a good idea. I was very happy that enough screen time had been devoted to the fight between Iorek and Ragnar, as this was a turning point for Iorek. The fight between the Gyptians and the Samoyed guards a Bolvangar was also given the screen time it was owed.

I had been reading reviews and some mentioned that the last few chapters had been omitted. I can see why this was done, and the film was ended at a logical point, but if they had gone that little bit further I am sure they could have ended it on more of a cliffhanger.

That all being said, I think that the makers have made a suitable on-screen representation of Philip Pullman's 'Northern Lights'. I can understand some of the omissions in the story for the purpose of making the film, and at least the producers and screenwriters didn't just rip pages out of the book and deem them suitable enough as I fear was the case with Christopher Paolini's 'Eragon'.

Christmas is coming...

But at least I only have one pressie to wrap up. Well, one pressie that I can get my hands on. I'm hoping Principessa's and Gaz's pressies get here before Christmas. I am kind of losing hope for Gaz's pressie. Ho hum!

We still have to get a tree. I have no idea where the tree was put away last year (yeah, a plastic tree :( No smell of pine and the great outdoors here.), or the deccos, for that matter. So it's a new tree this year. About time too, I say, because the tree we have has been making it's yearly appearance now for at least the last 10 years.

Principessa is all happy again. She can watch her already extensive DVD collection now that the DVD player has been sorted out. Something went wrong with the original one, it just stopped playing the discs. I think Principessa night have overworked the poor thing! Anyway, Grandand took it back to the shop and they gave us a new one. When we put the new one on, we could hear the audio, but there was no picture. We tried switching buttons around and blah blah blah, but nothing would reinstate the picture. Grandand took that one back the other day, they gave him a replacement, and now Principessa has turned into a girl with DVDs in her eyes. She was so excited this morning when she realised she could come downstairs and watch Shaun the Sheep and Charlie and Lola.

I think I'm going to have to buckle down and do some OU stuff now. I will get all worried and frustrated and disappointed with myself if I don't give it a go. I am still feeling all intimidated though.

You gotta love Bruce!

So, I wouldn't normally advertise an aftershave, but it's Bruce, and he's singing Duran Duran's Hungry Like The Wolf.

Fantastic!

And they say about the Acropolis where the Parthenon is...

Well, that doesn't really matter. What matters is that QI is a fantastic show, and only on QI would you have Jimmy Carr and Bill Bailey make Stephen Fry break down in laughter by singing "And they say about the Acropolis where the Parthenon is..." after he had a block with speaking. 'Twas great! But after watching the outtakes, it only confirmed that I still want to live in Johnny Vegas's head.







Okay, this isn't the outtakes, but still.

PANIC!!!

Sorry for the three exclamation marks, but 'tis how I feel. I received the first half of my OU course today, and just looking at it scares me. I am in a state of panic, depression, hap-hazard failure, and disappointment. Disappointed that I am already letting it get to me before the course has even started. I'm not even through the first week of the prep material. ARGH!

I think I need to be beaten around the head with a kipper, or something of the like. Why do I do these things to myself? It's not even started yet, and already I am not giving myself a chance to ease myself in. Talk about dumb. If I just shut my internal dialogue and think about this logically I might get somewhere. But no, I look at the materials and fold. Bah!

On writing... The LRRH story seems to be going okay. I'm quite surprised that it is. It is good that a little bit of inspiration has edged its way into my mulchy brain. I still haven't done much with the NaNo story since December, though I might have a little bit of movement in my thinking for that one. I've also been thinking a lot about my kid's story, and there might be a little more writing on that one too. Woohoo!

Well, back to the tippy-tapping on LRRH.

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Brrr! Shiver...

It's bloody cold! Okay, I know it's probably not as cold here as it is in other places in the world, but for here, and for me, it's bloody freezing! I have to say though, it's the first morning I've got up (thank you Principessa, I had I lie in until about 9.30am) and there has still been ice on the road. BRRRRRRR! I know I'd complain, but I just wish we had some snow, then it would be worth being cold.

Nanny is downstairs at the moment, as Principessa has kicked Nanny out of her room so she can watch the TV. She is such a little miss! She was very lovely this morning, getting up on the chair on the landing so that she could give me a hug a and a kiss. When I went into Nanny's room, she jumped up on Nanny's bed so she could continue with the hugging. Aw, she is so sweet! I just hope she gets out of this phase of calling things 'bloody'. (She shouts at her books; 'Get up there, you bloody books,' she will say.)

I am still stalled with my story. I think I need my starter motor kicked! I've not stopped writing completely though. I've started writing a short story, the first since I was about 16 years old. Long time ago! I am having a go at writing an updated version of Little Red Riding Hood. So far, I think it is going well. But I think I realised what one of my writing problems is while pondering on words for the new story. My brain works faster than my hands, and I continually mull things around, even when I'm not writing, so I can almost write the whole story in my head way before I write it on paper. This causes my head to think that the story is done, causing me then to stall. I don't exactly know how I am going to get around this, but I will have to work something out.

Feeling like a fraud.

I am banging my head against a brick wall. I have completely stalled with the writing. I think I have managed about 370 words over the last 10 days. Awful! I really need to have a guaranteed couple of hours to myself to work through the mulch that is the story, and unstick my feet from the boggy ground. Ho hum!

I am getting more and more anxious about the OU course. I'm worried that I wont have the time to do it, that the bits I do do will be horrendous, basically that I'll be crap at the course full stop. Can you tell my confidence is shot at the moment? Yeah? Damn, I thought I was hiding it well.

Principessa has been learning some new nursery rhymes lately. Nanny taught her Little Miss Muffet and Little Jack Horner. Well, Little Jack Horner changed his name to Captain DJ, and he doesn't pull plums out of pies. No, he pulls out bananas, apples and grapes. She is also insisting on singing 'Bluest skies', otherwise known as Sweet Child O' Mine by G'n'R, late at night. She's a funny little girl, she calls me Mummy Alligator or Mummy Crocodile ever since I taught her how to say 'See you later, alligator. In a while, crocodile.'

Improve your vocab and earn rice.

Have a look. Go to freerice.com. Have fun learning new words, while earning grains of rice for charity.

There's a light at the end of the tunnel.

Finally! I have started breaking through my block. It wasn't so much a problem with the writing, but a problem with the plot.

I knew I needed something to happen for something else to work later on in the story. Now, I've just moved from the story of the two main characters to the proper introduction of the antagonist, but something wasn't working. (Lots of somethings here, I know!) This, I am sure, is the reason for becoming stuck. Last night, as I sat in bed vegging out in front of the TV, something clicked. I think it might have been the fairy of inspiration bashing me over the head with the Twisty-Turny-Stick-Of-Twisty-Turny-Plotting. *Phew* I thought I was going to be obsessing about it for ever! So, I think that this might be significant enough to pull me through and get me writing frequently again.

The weather has been so bad lately that I haven't been able to take Principessa out. We need to go and buy some paper for her to scribble on, as the walls have been taking a battering due to the lack of paper. Argh! I also need to buy some pads for me.

I will have to start having a look through the preparatory material for my OU course. Yes, it's here! I am starting to worry though, I am feeling like I have bitten off more than I can chew with it. But, if I don't at least try, then I must be stupid!

I am not so worried about Christmas, however, as I have more or less everything done. Pressies have been bought. Pressies have been wrapped. Pressies for everyone, that is, but Principessa. She changes her mind so often that I am waiting for the 20th to go out and buy her stuff. I think I will be buying a wooden castle for her because she talks about castles so much. I will also get her some characters too, Prince and Princess, Wizard and Dragon etc. I am sure that the Night Garden characters will be living there though!

Autosports Awards.

Last night, Dad and I did what we always do on a Tuesday; we watched Spooks, but made time to watch the second episode on BBC3. When that had finished, I happened to turn over and catch the end of the Autosports Awards (didn't even know they had awards!). I'm glad I did, as Lewis Hamilton was there, scooping all the awards.

To begin, he won Rookie of the Year for his rookie year in F1. But then he won the next two awards, Best British Competition Driver and Best International Competition Driver. Fantastic as that was, I enjoyed the presentation of the awards by Viviane Senna more. Aw, he was so star struck! You could see he was getting all emotional when she compared him to her brother, Ayrton Senna. It was good to see. Made me smile, it did.

I still haven't picked up pen and paper. My brain was mulching last night, however, on how to continue the story, so I think I may try and break my writing dam today. I am feeling a bit better about it, so today is as good a day as any (or, as my fingers tried to type, as food a day as any).

But first, I must build a 'car-sle' with Principessa.

Momentum halted!

Well, the feeling of 'WooHoo' at reaching 10,000 words has been followed with the massive deflation of momentum, 'Whump'. The brain has flat-lined, the hand is refusing to do any work, citing writer's cramp, and there is a general feeling of blahness. Hmph.

I was feeling so good at the end of the month, but now I feel like a crumpled up piece of paper. Argh! I want to write, but I can't bring myself to do any. I'm wondering if I should just give myself a little break, but at the same time, I can't stop thinking about the story (Grrr, Principessa, you're letting the warm out again!) and working on some little twists. Maybe I should just take a break and let these ideas percolate in the Giant Coffepot of Thoughts and Plot Things, and pick up a pen later in the week.

I think the added pressure of filling out stupid amounts of forms has also deadened the writing process. Forms for the Open Uni, forms for the DSA, forms for tests of resources. Too many forms. The thought of a pen a paper puts me into Fear of Forms shock!

I think I need more sleep and a brain that feels less like squished cotton wool. (I hope the trip to the bookshop with Principessa this afternoon will help with this.)

Objective accomplished.

Yay! I did it! It is a small victory, but the word count for November ended at 10,070 words. Now I've just got to keep it going though December. All I need to do now is to cut the days I slack off. I know, I only slacked off for 5 days last month, but if I had written 300 words per day on those days, I would have reached 11,500 words. Ah poo!

I think I need to break the TV in my bedroom again. I ended up vegging out in front of it last night, instead of sleeping or doing something more productive. I don't think I would have been able to do anything though, Principessa had pounded my brain to mush by refusing to go to sleep until around 11.00pm. She just had to play Oopsy-Daisy and Tombly-boos slide on Mummy's matress! But still, even though she was being a pain, she was still cute.

So, the winter sport season has started. I have been watching the biathlon and ski-jumping. Oh, and a little bit of skiing. I winced when I heard about what had happened to one of the guys who was among the favourites to win the Ski World Championships. His name is Aksel Lund Svindal, and during a training session on Friday he crashed, resulting in a broken nose and cheekbone, and a 13 cm long tear between his groin and rear. OUCH! That last injury does not sound good. I'm wincing now, just writing about it.

I think I should get back to writing. Principessa is pre-occupied with Nanny, so I have a little free time.